Fake it till you make it.
In more recent day quotes it goes “faith” it till you make it.
I prefer to faith it over faking it.
But self doubt as a new coach can be debilitating to the point of quitting.
That’s why Imposter syndrome has to be dealt with before it cripples and crushes you to the ground.
Today I’m sharing my early day lackluster results as a hypnotist.
And how feeling like a fraud can be mitigated completely even if you’re a brand new coach.
I just got a new client. She paid how much?!
I don’t even know how that happened.
Do I even deserve that?
What if I can’t help them get results?!
If you can identify with this, you know it’s classic imposter syndrome.
Things are going better than expected. But you’re not ready to take ownership of that success.
If you have ever felt this way, you’re not alone!
Feelings of “not good enough”, “I am NOT that an expert YET”, are quite common even among the best of the best
Don’t believe me?
Any moment, someone’s going to find out I’m a total fraud. – Emma Watson
Sometimes I wake up in the morning before going off to a shoot, and I think, I can’t do this. I’m a fraud. – Kate Winslett
I have written eleven books, but each time I think, ‘uh oh, they’re going to find out now. I’ve run a game on everybody, and they’re going to find me out. – Maya Angelou
If Maya Angelou feels like a fraud, well… you and I are no special no snow flakes, are we?!
So first things first… it is 100% OKAY to feel those feelings.
What you’re feeling is a natural human emotion.
Now let’s dig a little deeper…
I AM NOT GOOD ENOUGH
What really drives the thought process of fraud syndrome is in fact the good old “I’m not good enough” story.
A lot of the time, it’s easy to get in to thought spirals of …
“But I don’t know if I can help a client overcome this problem. I haven’t really experienced it in my own life, and I’m not exactly sure how to approach this in a way that can guarantee results”.
“And if I can’t guarantee results, how can I ask a client to pay”
“After all, it’s their hard earned money”
“Do I even know enough about the subject?”
This can go on an on.
This “I am not good enough” story actually has little to do with the current situation in hand.
Yes, it has nothing to do with the client, or your ability to serve them.
It has a lot to do with childhood programming, conditioned patterns that got internalized through out life.
In this video I share with you the simple truth about “I am not enough” and how you can be more than enough in a matter of a quick mindset shift.
The simple truth about I am not enough and how you can be more than enough in a matter of a quick mindset shift.
STOP UNDERSELLING YOUR VALUE
Imposter syndrome has nothing to do with you ability. It has everything to do with self-belief.
Do you believe in your product, your service?
Do you believe in your ideas, concepts & values?
If yes, you’ve won half the battle in beating imposter syndrome.
A lot of the time, we try to over compensate lack of self-belief with low fees.
Do you find yourself undercharging, offering 24 hour access to you via text, extra hours at no charge, or something else that could possibly be a big inconvenience to you but you feel that it is serving the client more.. hoping the extra stuff will ensure results?
Set clear boundaries. Extra bells & whistles aren’t going to help. You do not need to carry the weight of the client.
Let them do the work. Your job is to guide them, coach them.
The baseball coach doesn’t play the tournament, the athlete does.
Your job is to prepare them for the game, not play the game for them.
Don’t let feelings of imposter syndrome, or lack of belief get in the way.
Show up powerfully, hold the space for the client and coach them with fierce confidence.
The next time you feel like you need do 101 things to help the client see results, back off! Take a long deep breath and say to yourself – “Infinite intelligence creates & presents through me. My intellect is illuminated as I work with clients. Universe reveals to me the best ways I can serve them. The genius within me is released. I can relax and hold the space for them, effortlessly”.
Use this in your daily affirmations. Better yet, use it with hypnosis.
FOCUS ON GROWTH & PRACTICAL EDUCATION
Part of the reason we feel like a fraud as a coach is because client’s come to us with complex problems. Problems that can spin your head sometimes.
That is when you slip into “I know I can help them, but geese I’m not sure if it’ll work because I haven’t really experienced this problem myself”.
Hear me out..
Let’s say you got sick. Home remedies aren’t working and webMD is saying you might have a life threatening condition – it could be a kidney failure.
So you go to a doctor. A nephrologist.
Do you ask the doctor, “have you had kidney failure? No? How can I trust you to give me the correct medicine then!”
You trust them because they have the credentials, the experience, the expertise!
Regardless of the fact that they’ve never had a kidney issue themselves, you trust them.
The doctor didn’t have to do a kidney transplant on himself to be seen as an expert.
So what makes them the expert in their specialized field?
Education. Experience. Skill Mastery. On going growth.
Education and powerful skill mastery is a game changer in being able to help people with complex problems you’ve never had to deal with yourself.
You can show up powerfully, with so much confidence and say yes, I can help you. Because I learned the subject to its utmost depth. I know what I’m talking about.
When I started as a certified hypnotist a decade ago, I was in my early twenties. Not many people took me seriously.
But they were intrigued. “Oh hypnosis! That’s super interesting. Tell me more”
“Wow how fascinating. I want to have a session. Use me as a lab rat. Give me a free session.”
Ummm, heck no!
I don’t need a lab rat. I spent too much time, money and energy learning my craft. I practiced and trained under experienced teachers and mentors while in training. I know what I’m doing.
So no. I will not do a free session.
Neither should you.
Invest time, energy and resources to educate yourself, to add new skills to your coaching tool box.
Practice newly learned skills diligently.
And no one, not even the inner critic within you will stand a chance to say “you’re not good enough”.
No one, not even yourself will ever have to worry about being a poser or a fraud.
Because you will have proof that you’re brilliant at what you do.
Because you learned your skills and mastered them like a true winner.
Dedicate 30 mins twice a week to learn something new that will directly improve your coaching skills. Put it down on your calendar right now and commit to learning.
Do this for 2 weeks and then you can consider expanding.
P.S. I hope you enjoyed this article on how to beat imposter syndrome as a coach.
If you want to add hypnosis as a new skill set to your coaching tool box, I have created a comprehensive resource that teaches 5 hypnosis techniques anyone can use to 10X client results in just 14 days – you don’t need to even hypnotize the client to make these work! Check it out below.
“Hypnosis is proven to be the most effective and fastest route to solve emotional issues!”
– Psychoanalysis: 38% recovery after 600 sessions
– Behavior therapy: 72% recovery after 22 sessions
– Hypnotherapy: 93% recover after only 6 sessions!
Source: Psychotherapy Magazine (Vol. 7, No.1, Alfred A. Barrios, PhD)